The Divorce Came Through

In spite of the little levity of that graphic I found, I did think to announce to everyone that today, after some years of waiting, my divorce finally came through.

In spite of it all, I still believe in God’s institution of marriage and family; it’s just that without going into detail, I have come to the conclusion, that while some might be able to live with abuse and tolerate maltreatment, I reached a point in the road where it just wasn’t good enough for me and my children. That little graphic almost rings true, because I dared ever to have a thought outside my abuser’s ideal place for HIM, little by little it became clear that I would be made to suffer and so would those most precious to me. I did not initiate divorce, I initiated the leaving. I needed for my children and I to be safe.

Those who really cared about me during the worst of the times, could see things were very wrong. To them, this is a day of celebration and finality. I can understand that. I know it is hard to watch the ones you dearly love hurt.

To me, this end is a tragedy, but so was the living it. I had to choose which tragic path to take as there were no easy answers. I got us out, he chose to continue his ways.

My love and gratitude goes out to those who have been so supportive, wishing only good things to come my way and for my children too. Thank you for your caring, upholding me when I could hardly do it for myself. I still need you this next cross in the road. I know I can’t take much more hurt, so I will treasure your love as always when you share it with me, which hopefully dissolves some of the hurt, but not the lessons learned from it.

Love you
~Barb

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7 Responses

  1. Matthew says:

    I’m sorry that it ended for you this way. But I’m hopeful that God will continue to work in you both to “will and to do His good pleasure” and that His promise “all things work together for good for those who are called according to His name.”
    May you experience His comfort in this trying time.

  2. Petra says:

    After all these years of love and friendship, all this time of abuse and hurt, you are still YOU. Strong, gregarious, giving, full of humor and compassion, YOU. I give thanks to the Lord for being part of your life. And I believe He sends His angels to watch over you and me and the ones we love.
    The rest, dear sister, is up to us…
    I love you.

  3. the Grit says:

    Hi Barb,

    Hang in there.

    the Grit

  4. Rodney Olsen says:

    I won’t pretend to know what you’re going through but I’m sure that there must be a mixture of emotions. As bad as things were and as right as it was to leave, I’m sure that there are still feelings of grief that something has now been lost.

    I’m glad that you can now move on. I hope that the hurts of the past won’t prevent you from experiencing even greater joy in the days to come.

  5. Hope all goes well from this point on………steve

  6. Lon says:

    Thanks for being so vulnerable and sharing your thoughts. I have no doubt God continues to pursue you with his love…

  7. Kristee says:

    Hugs 4 u Barb! I am sorry you have had to go through this. Nothing about it is easy. I can just imagine the anguish you have suffered. I hope you are truly free. I mean in the spiritual sense, knowing that the sin is NOT on you but the abuser who left you no choice.
    Be blessed and rest in the love and joy of our Savior.
    Kristee

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